Today’s the day we sing

First off, I want to wish my hubby a happy birthday (a few days late…oopsie). I didn’t wish him a “happy birthday” on Facebook, which could be grounds for divorce for some these days…however…I did put lots of love, sweat, and tears into a home made sweet bread (that somehow I under baked for the second year in a row), but it’s his favorite…and it’s the thought and effort that counts, right (??). I’m also making a big deal about his birthday on this blog (a few sentences should suffice). So if you know Bear, and haven’t already, wish him a big Happy Birthday! He’s the greatest and absolutely deserves it! And, if you have a good sweet bread recipe, feel free to send him a loaf that is properly baked 🙂

I’ve been going back and forth this week on what to write about. I had a whole post written out about our IVF appointment we had on Friday (which went great! More to come on that later), but changed my mind, at least for this week. Then I was listening to my favorite song of the moment (you know that song that comes on the radio that you blast and belt out to the point that people look at you funny when you’re at red light) and realized there’s a few lines that stood out. Substitute a couple pronouns here and there and it makes me think of Quinlan. The song is appropriately called “Legends”.

The song is of course a love song, but not in a romantic kind of way. To me, it’s a love song for any kind relationship that makes you feel the ups and downs, the bittersweet moments, but knowing it’s all meant to be no matter the outcome. Knowing from day one that there was something going on with Quinlan that didn’t seem “normal”, never took away from us wanting to experience every little thing that comes with being a parent. Every moment we went through was bittersweet. I can’t necessarily sit here and say that we expected to lose Quinlan as soon as we did, but there was always a thought that nothing was promised. Every late night feeding, every time he peed all over whoever was changing him, every laugh we were lucky enough to hear from him for his first few months, every time he grabbed our hand and held on tight, they were all moments that were meant to be and we would never take them for granted, good or bad (aaaand here come the tears again – whoosh).

What everyone wondered we never question –  one of the most frequently asked questions to Bear and I was “how do you do it?”. Our answer was always “we just do it”. There was never a question of how or why. We met up with some of Quinlan’s nurses (turned friends) this weekend and they mentioned how amazing it was that Bear and I always did whatever we had to, to get Quinlan home. There was never another possible option for us. We never questioned it.

We were crazy Tragic and epic and so amazing – this has been our life for the last 3 years. We were crazy, we ARE crazy, crazy in love with the little man who stole the hearts of so many. “Tragic – causing or characterized by extreme distress or sorrow” (I don’t think this needs any explanation as related to our life). “Epic and so amazing” – how Quinlan made us feel every day of the 2 years 5 months and 1 day of his life. Yes, it was crazy and tragic and epic, but it was amazing.

We wrote our own story – this line in particular stays with me. We all write our own story. It would be so easy to give up, but I don’t want to. I want to write the story of Quinlan. Share his story for as many people to hear as possible, make him the legend he is.

While reading through the lyrics, I realized I could analyze pretty much every line, but I will spare you. I’ve included the lyrics below for your own analyzing enjoyment. It’s a great song, and yes it’s country (to the displeasure of many of my friends), but it’s good, I promise. Listen to it, love it, think of the relationships in your life that mean the most, and appreciate every moment of them.

Legends by Kelsea Ballerini

We were golden, we were fire, we were magic
Yeah, and they all knew our names all over town
We had it made in the middle of the madness
We were neon in a grey crowd
Yeah, we wrote our own story
Full of blood sweat and heartbeats
We didn’t do it for the fame or the glory
And but we went down in history

Yeah, we were legends
Loving you, baby, it was heaven
What everyone wondered, we’d never question
Close our eyes and took on the world together
Do you remember?
We were crazy
Tragic and epic and so amazing
I’ll always wear the crown that you gave me
We will always stay lost in forever
And they’ll remember
We were legends

Like we were written down in permanent marker
Not even the brightest sun could ever fade
Come whichever hell or high water
It was always me and you either way
Hey, we wrote our own story
Full of blood sweat and heartbeats
We didn’t do it for the fame or the glory
We just did it for you and me

And that’s why we were legends
Loving you, baby, it was heaven
What everyone wondered, we’d never question
Close our eyes and took on the world together
Do you remember?
We were crazy
Tragic and epic and so amazing
I’ll always wear the crown that you gave me
We will always stay lost in forever
And they’ll remember
We were legends

We were legends
Loving you, baby, it was heaven
What everyone wondered, we’d never question
Close our eyes and took on the world together
Do you remember, baby?
We were crazy
Tragic and epic and so amazing
I’ll always wear the crown that you gave me
We will always stay lost in forever
And they’ll remember
We were legends
We were, yeah, we were legends
Yeah, we wrote our own story 

💚Mama Bear

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